MONEY IN YOUR TEENAGER’S POCKET
Parenting or should we say mothering teenagers has been a challenge through ages. We prefer to use mothering, as generally dads are busy with making moolah while the moms, even though working, deal directly with their teenage children.
Now talking about challenges, it’s a bigger challenge in a country like India with its ever evolving culture and society. As we open to global (read western) ways of life, our teenagers are becoming more independent and liberal. Though there’s also a culture of more teenagers picking up vocational jobs, but that’s just vocational, limited to a couple of months.
For the rest of the year, they depend on pocket money to take care of their ever increasing needs. In such a scenario, it’s not wise to deny them their chunk. So you need to handle this one very tactfully.
THE SHOCK
Be ready for a hard bargain when your teenager approaches you for pocket money for the first time or for a hike. In the first instance, be prepared for a shock. Teens may put up an outlandish figure. But you may bargain. Settle for something in between. Make your child understand why she shouldn’t be getting what she demanded for.
WHY
Ask her why she wants pocket money. But while you do this, try not to act cop interrogating a small-time burglar who steals to fund a luxurious lifestyle. Talk to your child like a friend. Try and put across to her if there’s something you think she shouldn’t be looking forward to for her age.
EARN YOUR MONEY
To make them understand the value of money, you may at times give them the pocket money as a reward for finishing some work or for some achievement. This way they will know that money is not earned for relaxing. You have to slog it out.
WHAT ARE THEY DOING
Keep a check on where they are spending the money you give them. No! You don’t have to be Mata Hari. Teenagers are averse to too much attention from parents. They immediately turn hostile. The best thing to do would be to spend more time with them. As you talk more, they will be comfortable and would tell you mostly what they have been up to.
However, don’t try to know everything. There are always things teenagers spend on which we all know about. But these things may not to appropriate to be discussed with parents. So even if you know that your teenager is keeping back some details it would be unwise to dig in. Remember your time. Yes if you think she’s up to something that may harm her, convey it subtly without getting outrageous.
MAKING THEM MONEY-CONSCIOUS:
Kids are becoming independent at an early age these days. But no matter how early they branch out, the biggest influence in their lives is of their parents more specifically of their mothers. So you be careful how you treat money while your kid is around.
An hour of lecture every now and then would only be as good as a bouncer. Nothing will sink in. But as your teenager sees you settling for a lower range watch when you easily could have bought the more expensive one, she will definitely pick the gesture.
So you don’t have to wake up sweating at nights if your teenager has asked for pocket money or if you think she’s not spending it right. Just be a smart mom...a friend... to your teenager.
